We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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