you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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