I have demons in me.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
ugly people sure do ruin things
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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