I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Randomize
