He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Randomize
