Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Ladies don't puke and tell
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
