On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize