I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
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