he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
