wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
lets start a swedish sibling band together
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
