just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize