i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
We need to get me chipped asap
Do you have feelings for this penis?
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
