ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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