You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
how does that bad decision feel?
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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