She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
