I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Randomize