carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
