Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
