I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I am naked and annoyed.
Randomize
