He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
