At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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