Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
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