They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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