I got her a Nickelback box set.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
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