Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize
