I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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