We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
