So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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