went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize