Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Randomize
