found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?