omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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