is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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