Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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