I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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