needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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