somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I have demons in me.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
