super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize