i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Is it penis luge time yet?
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
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