i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize