I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
