Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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