Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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