I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
