no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Randomize
