What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
True strength comes from lack of pants
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize