Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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