Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Randomize
