i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
