Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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