Kiss
Puke
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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